When Your Husband Thinks Technology is Sexier Than You

Me: Honey, some dude commenting on my blog called me hot today – off topic and out of the blue!

Husband: Yeah? (Not real interested, so goes back to his computer to his own task)

Me: (desperately trying to pursue this conversation) Yeah, he called me “smoking hot.”

Husband: (still unfazed) Why? What was your blog about?

Me: Like I just said, this compliment was totally off topic.

Husband: Such weirdos commenting on blogs – they don’t even read them

Me: (Thinking but not saying aloud) That’s it?? That’s it?? No agreement, or anything?

Me: (audibly) SIGH

How I wish the conversation could have gone:

Me: Honey, some dude commenting on my blog called me hot today

Husband: Well, he has good taste

Me: Smoking hot, that’s how he put it, and it was off topic

Husband: You ARE smoking hot – now come here you little vixen

Passionate embrace follows.

Sigh again. Maybe in another lifetime.

I am a middle aged woman, so sometimes a compliment is a good thing. Though I admit, I kind of have a simultaneous reaction of being flattered and creeped out when I get complimented like being called “hot,” it is still a nice feeling.

It is always surprising in middle age. You don’t exactly go around thinking of yourself as a sexual being.

A few months ago, I received a “mash note” in my car’s windshield. Some guy saw me walking into a store and left his business card on my car after I exited it, in case I wanted to contact him to “get together.” (IMPORTANT NOTE: I blame this on being blond and wearing lipstick and shades – it is a combination that causes things like that to happen regardless of looking middle-aged)

My reaction was to be creeped out and grateful that the guy didn’t try to pick me up in person. Ew.  But when I brought the note home and proudly announced to my husband that I received a mash note, he had no clue what a mash note was. When he read it, he seemed to have no reaction except to immediately look up the definition of “mash note” and tell me that lots of people don’t know what that term means – all according to the Internet.

How do you make a mash note tech related? Ask my husband – this is his special talent.

In case anyone out there is interested, this is almost exactly what my novel-in-progress is about: a woman in mid-life who is not nearly as sexy as a tech website or gadget to her middle aged tech-nerd husband. Stay tuned.

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