Husband Follies: He Makes Me Laugh

It’s that time once again, and I know some of my readers most look forward to these Husband Follies blogs. (Soon to be included in their entirety in my Best of Hot Flashes book.)

This Husband Follies is in honor of my husband Gary’s 64th birthday.  Yes, his 64th Birthday, though he defies that age realm. And here are the answers to the questions he may be asking me due to a certain famous song: Yes, I will still need you, and Yes, I will still feed you, and Yes, I will still be sending you a Valentine, birthday greetings (this blog!!) and a bottle of wine.

The reason I keep this guy around, other than his good looks and his heart of gold, is his sense of humor. He is a funny guy and it is a key component of his personality. I am known in the trade as an “easy laugher.” When my funny bone is tickled, I laugh. Actually, I laugh a lot — because I believe in the adage, Laughter is the Best Medicine – it has gotten me through some very bumpy roads in life, and I have always loved to laugh. Maybe that’s what keeps me young at heart as well.

I have ALWAYS had a weakness for a guy with a good sense of humor – you can keep your athletes, movie stars, and rock stars. Give me a funny guy any day of the week. Oh Steven Colbert, I am talking to you, you adorable funny nerd. But really, every guy I ever had any kind of meaningful relationship – friendship-wise or in love, was funny.

Not everyone would find Gary’s humor as funny as I do, but I really get him and his humor, and he is a guy who can make me laugh so hard it brings tears to my eyes. Sometimes he gives me one of those deep, deep belly laughs. You know the type: it stretches way into your belly, that reaches down into your very soul, and then your laughter comes up and out as a vibration through your esophagus, and out of your throat almost like a cough, where you can barely breathe.  I have doubled over laughing from his humor, and the best times are when we both find what he says is humorous and we start laughing in tandem. That’s when it gets contagious, and we keep laughing and laughing until we both have tears in our eyes. Those moments are actually priceless.

More often, Gary will say or do something that absolutely tickles me. I am left with the memory and will giggle or titter over it at random moments recalling it through the day, or even days later.

He thinks I am funny too – although I am a very different funny. I am a goofy, and mostly witty type of funny. I write funny. Gary would not have the first clue how to write funny. So it’s true that we make each other laugh, but our humor is very different.

That our best times are in laughing together is important to note because Michael Nesmith (yes, of the Monkees but more recently an entrepreneur and author) recently quoted on social media, that what he misses most about being in a love relationship is the laughter. I understand what he meant, because those shared laughs are the secret language of lovers, and those private jokes- getting each other’s sense of humor, is a key element of many successful relationships.

When I first brought Gary around, he won over my kids with his sense of humor, and that was no easy task.

So, in case you are curious, here is one example of his type of comedy for you – and I happen to think this example is hilarious, but you may just find it slightly clever. (I use the term hilarious a lot but I really believe it when I say it.) It recently came back up as a memory on my FB page of all things, and remembering it, I was giggling all day long, and I am giggling even now as I recount it for you. For me, it was THAT funny.

After our flood two years ago, our house was torn apart, there was drywall dust, chaos, and a stripped down bare, kind of smelly house. (Mostly bleach and other disinfectant to ward off mold.) My housekeeper Viki of many, many years, and an important member of our household, couldn’t take the chaos and the house in that condition and quit on me. I was grieving my home and things, and then my Viki left me. It was a sad time.

Now mind you, Viki doesn’t speak English and so I communicate with her in my pathetic, broken Spanish with simply awful pronunciation and a horrific accent, with language that I have picked up. (I never took Spanish in HS or college, I took 4 years of French) Between her few words of English picked up, and my Spanish, we communicate just fine, but we sometimes resemble a situation comedy like “I Love Lucy” during the conversations. There are a lot of hand motions until we get the gist of what we are trying to say to one another and she is always quick to correct me when I say mesa and mean mes.(I do know mesa is a table and mes is month but again, I mess up a lot.)

Back to the story: Out of the blue, weeks after Viki quit, she showed up and explained to me, En Espanol, that she was just taking a summer break – a leave of absence, and when my house was back in good condition and order, in September, after everything was cleared out and it did not smell anymore, she would come back to me.

Gary was amused by our broken Spanish and English conversation, but needless to say, we were both thrilled we were getting our Viki back. (I had hired a replacement that left a lot to be desired.) I said, “Okay, we will see you in September.”  Then I said it in Spanish, “Hasta Septembre.”

Gary at that moment immediately thought of the teen song from the sixties, “See you in September,” and so he found a YouTube version of it in Spanish which he played for her. Viki smiled, but she would not have known or remembered that song like I did. I laughed so hard, and then he posted it on Facebook. I am linking it here because this story still tickles me and so does this song. I mean, who would even think of searching for a Spanish version of that song? And hearing the teen group croon “Te Vere en Septembre” – oh my goodness, that’s funny. (Please take a listen as I linked it above if you don’t believe me.) Only my Gary.

Anyway, this was two years ago, but it came up as a FB memory just the other day and when I shared it with Gary again, we both laughed at the memory. (Thank you FB memories for providing those old laughs to recycle.)

Now, you might not find any of the above very funny, but the thing about Gary is that he always, always, always can lighten the mood, or find comedy in any given moment, even when there are serious things like return to work negotiations going on. I like that about him.

And so, I put up with his shtick, and of course he puts up with mine— we all have it, you know, because he makes me laugh.

Happy 64th Birthday to my quirky, funny guy – I love you!

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