How I Became Dear Abby and Now You Try It!

I may have mentioned a time or two that there are certain blogs of mine that are the number one or two or three links that the average person comes upon when they Google certain topics. People pay for top Google rankings on searches, so I am not about to start complaining about that, as any exposure is good exposure when you are trying to get your writing out to the masses.

Except did I mention about my Possum story and how I always get Possum-loving angry people writing me, cursing me, calling me stupid etc.? I never knew there were so many Possum loving people in the world, but my mail stream on it is constant. I could withdraw the story from my site to avoid this as it seems I am pretty high up on Possum Google searches, but I kind of get amused by these people. Here are the blogs linked – the original and the apology one.

I have also mentioned my First Love blog numerous times as it ranks very high on Google in some sort of First Love search. How do I know this? Because I get messages from people around the world on a regular basis about the following topics: Their First Love Experience, Reuniting with Their First Love, Still Loving Their First Love, etc. Usually, they ask my advice on love, or about their first love, or at least want my opinion or response. More on that below.

By the way, and you know I never miss an opportunity to promote my blogs, if you haven’t read my First Love blog, please do so at the highlighted link. I used to write a feature (now discontinued) for the Houston Chronicle called Love Stories and so I am an expert writer in that realm. I have to say the First Love blog only got written because I was looking for a unique way to say Happy Birthday to that guy who was my first love, who I am still friends with, via long distance. So it is interesting that it is getting so much mileage.

I also enjoy that my writing makes people feel that I am accessible to them. Something resonates with them after reading my pieces, and they feel compelled to reach out to me. I have been told countless times that my writing style is like chatting with a good friend or a long time friend, and I am glad that people feel that way.

Still though, I do feel compelled to answer anyone who took the time to write me, and some of the letters are very poignant.

So here’s the thing. Some of them force me to be Dear Abby and dispense advice. It’s not that I don’t feel capable, well, then again, maybe I am recognizing that the responsibility of giving advice — to sometimes say what the person needs to hear to move on, is a bit heavy-duty for a responsibility that I never even asked for in the first place.

At any rate, to give you an example, I got this letter this week. The English is awkward, as the person admitted that English is not their first language, and as I said above, I get letters from all over the world. Maybe I will publish them someday in a book as “Letters to a Blogger.” I am going to reprint this latest one here, with name withheld for privacy, and I want my readers to give ME advice on how to respond.

So if any of you are an aspiring Dear Abby, here is your chance – fire away!  I will combine the best responses into my response to the person as this one is very sad. Here it is in quote marks below:

“Hello, this blog it’s already posted for a while. I wanted to comment because i really want your respond actually, i never have any love or in a relationship before, i never bother to think about that until i came across your blog. And you are a very lucky women who have a very nice friend. I used to think that love is very impossible for me to felt it, many of my friends already have their own partner. I think i never find that one person that will be by my side and love. I mean, is it possible? So far no one have any intention to take an interest of me, is it really possible that one person will truly loves me just like your first love? Thank you for the sharing about your experience and sorry if there were some words wrong in my comment, english is not my first language :)”

So there you have it. A typical Dear Abby for the lovelorn, don’t you think? Please help me respond. Waiting for your comments below, or in the various social media realms, or even via message — which the bulk of my responses always seem to be placed.



  • I wish I knew the age of this writer. Is it a young person, a potential late bloomer? Or is it someone who is older who has social anxiety or low self esteem. In either case, I would advise him/her to stay active.; to be curious about the world around them and to expose themselves to as much as possible. Be a joiner. Whether it’s a community athletic team, a place of worship, a volunteer opportunity or a cultural activity, they should choose something that would be both enjoyable and would provide them with the opportunity to meet lots of people. Be outgoing ( even if you have to force it at first), pleasant, open to everyone and smile, smile, smile.

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